The other day, I was sharing with a friend about my marriage. I noted that at the beginning of this marriage, my desire was to submit to my husband and to allow him to be the head of our home. I explained that during my first marriage, I had constantly fought against that role, probably because what I saw growing up was an example of "submissive = doormat," which is not at all what God intends when He commands wives to submit to their husbands. Be that as it may, I went into my second marriage with high hopes for a God-pleasing marriage.
It didn't take long for me to figure out that it was difficult, if not impossible, to submit to a man who didn't have any desire to lead, who was unwilling to make any decisions, and who would never disagree with his spouse, even if she suggested something that he secretly didn't want to do. To be honest, looking back on the situation, I have to wonder what would've happened if I had matched his level of passivity with my own. Maybe eventually he would've stepped up to the plate. Or maybe not.
My friend made a very astute comment. He said, "In my experience, in those cases the couple doesn't share a vision."
It was then that I realized that my ex-husband never voiced his vision to me, if indeed he had one.
Since then, I have been mulling over the need for a personal vision.
I believe that I may need to start with a mission statement, an overriding purpose for my life, and then capture the details in a vision statement. So let me share with you what I have come up with so far for my mission statement and vision statement. Please remember, these are works in progress, and are likely to change, to be edited and refined as time goes on. But here is my starting point.
My mission is to glorify God by being an instrument of healing to people who are suffering from the relational brokenness that pervades our world.
My vision is to do this through a ministry of marriage and family counseling, where I will encourage, and challenge people to live in God-pleasing relationships, and will offer comfort to those who have been harmed by the breakdown of their families.
So there it is: My first draft of my personal mission and vision statements. I am looking forward to revising these as I begin to learn more about counseling when I start school this fall!